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Entry 366? HA!
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OMG!!!
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the strangest of places
THIS ONE!!!
Thursday
THURSDAY!!!
till dreams come true
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X-File
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Year of the ROOSTER
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Yowl....
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
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MANDALABLOG
Wednesday, October 26, 2005
Jupiter in Scorpio
Mood:
 caffeinated
Now Playing: Bloodhound Gang
Topic: What You Want
YAHOO!!! Jupiter, that planet of Luck and Expansion moved into Scorpio yesterday. this is also the planet of excess and it's influence in Scorpio deals with getting what you want! This is a time for really taking a moment to think about what is most important to you, and to believe that you deseve it! It is also a time to be careful what you wish for! (more than usual) The universe has a funny way of responding to our wishes. It is very literal. Ask for money-you will find a dollar in your laundry. The cosmic comedians are trying to teach you to communicate effectively. There have been many adjustments happening in the energy belts around earth and we are all learning to do things in ways that we never before thought possible. There is a phenomena that is making our crown chakra vibrate faster than the rest of our system can handle. It can whip the energy right out of our 1st and 2nd chakras and send it skyward, leaving us airheaded and disoriented. For most people it manifests in the 5th chakra-throat-for those who are a little more attuned, it will also show up in the 6th-third eye. It is IMPERATIVE that we begin to communicate about the things that are making life difficult. It is CRUCIAL that we keep the 1st and 2nd chakras open-even if they are a little drained-and stay grounded, or we will manifest trauma in the earthly realm. I am seeing this as "the Marilyn Monroe Syndrome". The energy is like that of that famous shot of her white dress blowing up around her. It takes effort to hold it down while the subway train goes by, but once again comes back to earth (what goes up...). She is a lesson in what happens here. She is still the icon of sexuality and her exploits are infamous, but she was never really in touch with all of that power and instead of using it for good, she killed it. She was always reaching for the stars, not realizing that she was among them. You are too-in your own way-CELEBRATE IT! What is going on in the energy fields right now is trying to teach that to the masses. Stop and take a moment to connect yourself to the ground. Picture your energy coming from around your head and neck, and flowing down around you (like lava?) and connecting you to the earth. We are all a part of it. Enjoy it while it lasts!
Posted by mandalafly
at 11:22 AM PDT
Tuesday, October 25, 2005
Enter the Dragon
Mood:
 special
Now Playing: Imagine-John Lennon
Topic: Raaawwwwrrrrrr
I love this game. I wrote about Scorpio's with a shout out to my Leo, and when I went to the Fajita Factory my boss was doing orientation for GUESS WHAT!!! Yes-a Scorpio and a Leo! Due to my reputation as the staff astro-nut (they only see the tip of the iceberg!) I didn't even have to ask them for that information! The Leo is an Ordained Minister from the Clearsight Aura Institute in Santa Monica. They teach a form of energy healing to clear old patterns and the like from your energy field. I only had a brief chance to ask her about it (since they were in orientation) and I got an initial impression of "Holier than Thou". It was definately "She Leo" in nature. It woke my Dragon IMMEDIATELY! and I got all bristled! I walked away and examined my motives-I thought about whether I was threatened, and I realized that it was part of the healing process to face things in others that you might not even realize about yourself. Do I come across as having all the answers? I'd have to say Yes! Sometimes I say "I KNOW" when I haven't even heard what it is (just ask Baboo!) Like I said-it was a brief encounter, and not really the forum for discussion on this infinite subject. I have to say that I left with the hairs standing up on my arms, and the thought "Hmph-so you think you know it all, do you?" I asked this question to my s'elf and I know that I have only scratched the surface of everything that I am interested in experiencing in this lifetime. I am looking forward to the opportunity to talk to this person in greater detail, under more hospitable conditions. The force is strong within us, and we are aware. Will it be a Meeting of the Minds, or a Clash of the Titans! I vote yes. This is what I live for!
Posted by mandalafly
at 10:02 AM PDT
Monday, October 24, 2005
Scorpio Magic
Mood:
 energetic
Now Playing: Blood, Sugar, Sex, Magic-Red Hot Chili Peppers
Topic: Proceed with Caution
Welcome to Scorpio. Makes me hot just thinking about it. Doesn't hurt that my bestest friend EVER is a Scorpio (November 6). Or that two of the men that I would say had the most influence on my "awakening" are Scorpios (October 31, and November 13-yes it was a Friday that year!) I LOVE SCORPIOS! (Don't worry, my Leo Baboo-you are still the center of my universe!) Scorpio is the eighth house of the zodiac, and is the house of Birth, Death and Regeneration. It rules the reproductive system. The Phoenix is an appropriate symbol for this sign. Out of the ashes, we rise anew. (Does it surprise you that I met my aforementioned best friend on my first day at Phoenix Middle School?) Scorpios are ruled by Pluto. I always say that my Scorpios think they know everything because their planet is on the outside of the universe and they can look in on the rest of us. They are secretive, and don't always tell us what they think (and you probably wouldn't like it if they did-the STINGER!). Mostly what they see is deeper than many people want to go in this lifetime. Scorpio influences tell us about our mystical side. Scorpios usually have a sense of deep emotion early in life, and it can take a number of years for them to figure out not everyone can feel the psychic undercurrents they are born knowing. This can make for some pretty introverted kids. They should be encouraged to express themselves in healthy ways. Pluto is a generational influence planet. It can take between 12 and 21 years for it to transit a house due to it's erratic orbit. My generation has Pluto in Virgo, which is about setting things "right". In 1979 until 1999 Pluto became the 8th planet when it's orbit crossed that of Neptune and the generation that was born here has Pluto in it's native house of Scorpio. This is truly a placement of sweeping reform. It will be interesting to see what the kids with it do to change to present course-(mostly from the generation with Pluto in Leo-the house of ME). Wishg them luck as they flip over the tables of the moneychangers!!!
Posted by mandalafly
at 10:10 AM PDT
Thursday, October 20, 2005
I'm Serious
Mood:
 chillin'
Now Playing: Sabotage-Beastie Boys
Topic: Believe You Me!
Oh, Casa del Drama, Release me from the spell that you have over me. I have done my part, and got this far, and have set my boundries, and yet you push with velvet gloves-you use my friends to try to pull me in for more than I can give. It is not okay. Forgive the young and clueless, who do not understand that it is not my place to jump in and cover their asses when they pull something stupid and can't fulfill their end of the bargain. Help those who are too kind. Those who DO cover the asses of aforementioned clueless young'uns, to the point of being so burnt out that they can't even figure out where their boundries are. Take care of those who need you. Bestow prosperity on those who depend upon you. Allow them to reap rewards for their dedication to the cause. Reward loyalty. Hold people accountable. Serve your purpose. Feed the masses. I have seen behind the curtain, and I am looking the great and powerful Oz in the eye. I have had the power all along. SET ME FREE.
Posted by mandalafly
at 12:01 AM PDT
Updated: Friday, October 21, 2005 12:07 AM PDT
Tuesday, October 18, 2005
Tuning In
Mood:
 lucky
Now Playing: Ruby Tuesday-The Rolling Stones
Topic: Clarity
I walk into this room that is set up like a sort of market. Kind of like Saturday Market, but it is indoors, in what appears to be some sort of community, or center of some kind. It is indoors, and one of the vendors tells me that I can set up there, and is explaining the rules to me. I am walking through it with Baboo and Tyrone, and I am looking at the other vendors merchandise. I look at this one booth. It has sheer white curtains for walls, and it has a very Vedic feel to the handmade clothing. I look and there is a large flat stone painted with Gonesh in the middle, and it says "Shambala". (There is a store called that in downtown Eugene, and it looks like their logo-I should probably look into it!) I am breathless. I come across a girl with a couple of hairwraps started in her hair, and I meet a guy who is doing them. I look at his work. He is new at it, and the wraps are not nearly as complex or practiced as mine, and I realize that he is making a living at it. I think about "why I don't try to do that", and I rationalize that his expenses do not include two teenage boys. I try to talk to him and show him an example of my wraps, but he is too caught up in what he has learned and seems to be taking my interest as a form of criticism, and does not want to see my work. I say "his loss". From everyone-I learn. I continue looking through the place, wondering about becoming a member of the community, and all of a sudden I am swept away by my boss from the Plaza del Puercos. He grabs me and whips me into a Tango-like dance, and I think to my self "I am dancing with the Devil". I am uncomfortable, as he is very seductive, and I look around for Baboo who is not to be seen. (probably better he is not witnessing the dance!) I break away, and I am left in a house that is kind of a mess, and I am trying to figure out where my boy and his dog are. All of a sudden they appear, and Baboo has brought me a gift. It is a handcrafted piece that looks kind of like those very ornate Scandinavian clocks. It has cooking spices across the top of it, and it has tinctures and other handcrafted herbs and such in little bottles. I catch a glimpse of the price on one of the vials, and it says $149. I realize that this is a pricy gift, and I all of a sudden get very anxious about where the money came from for this extravagant token of affection. It is clear to me what every thing in this dream is saying to me. It is obvious that I was dealing with a number of levels of anxiety. I see so many of my habits in here that I wonder how it is that I can even function living under this kind of (self-imposed) pressure. I see things that I want to be able to change, and I know that the time is coming. I wanted to walk into the Flaming Fuentes and Q-U-I-T today, but I know that I will know when the time is now, and I feel that that time is coming sooner than I even expect. I am truly looking forward to it, but I know too that there are a few things that have yet to be taken care of there. To this I say -GODSPEED-Let's get on with the show!!!
Posted by mandalafly
at 11:56 PM PDT
Sunday, October 16, 2005
It Goes to 11
Mood:
 spacey
Now Playing: Big Bottom-Spinal Tap
Topic: Numerology
Intuition, Idealism, Invention. This is the meaning of the master numer 11. They say that when you notice the time 11:11 on your clock, there will soon come an experience that will raise your awareness. 11 is the number of disciples that remained true to Christ. When you are figuring out your birthpath number, you add the numbers of your birthday-(ex:12+31+1964=2007=9) If it adds up to a two digit number, you add those two numbers to get a one digit number-UNLESS it is an 11 or 22. These are called Master Numbers. Last week when Eddie died, there were an amazing amount of 11's around. His birthdate-2/11, his expiration date 10/11 and all of the aforementioned 11's that corresponded (see 10/13 blog entry) One random factoid from the radio was that it was "11 weeks until Christmas" (you just never know where your divine inspiration will come from next!). I knew that I needed to find out what 11 meant. According to the Qabalah, the 11th path is "facing the creator." It is pretty obvious that Eddie is doing just that. I suppose that we should all be ready at any time to do so as well. Not to be morbid, but you just never know. I know that many belief systems encourage you to live each day as if it were your last. There is a Native American morning tobacco prayer that ends with "Today is a good day to die." I am having a hard time with this, because I know that if today were my last day, I would not have spent it the way I'd have liked (didn't make any artwork, missed my son's hockey practice, frozen pizza for dinner-ouch!). Tomorrow I am spending my 10th day in a row at the Arroz con Pollo Plaza. I keep going back, waiting for some form of stability that continues to be elusive. When will I ever learn? Guess we'll see.
Posted by mandalafly
at 10:53 PM PDT
Updated: Monday, October 17, 2005 8:27 PM PDT
Thursday, October 13, 2005
Coincidence?
Mood:
 quizzical
Now Playing: Freebird-Lynyrd Skynyrd
Topic: X-File
Hey Y'all-It's one of my favorite dates on the calender because it is tenthirteen, which is the name of the production company that produced X-Files, which I like for obvious reasons. (It is also the birthday of my ex father in-law, and Sammy Hagar[pass the CaboWabo!]) Today also just happened to be Eddie's funeral (that was fast-huh!)and a day of magic and mayhem! One of the things that I found out today was that Eddie was born on February 11-which was his mother's birthday. He passed away on October 11-his father's birthday. Like I said, his funeral was today-the day I call X-File Day. In my life February 11th is Tyrone's birthday, my ex-mother in law's birthday, AND the birthdate of the woman whose mandala I am currently working on! HOLY FRIJOLES!!! You can't convince me that there isn't something special about all of this!!! The most magical moment of the day came for me at the end of his service. I woke up this morning singing Freebird because I had heard it in a dream last night. After all was said and done it was played at the funeral for him!!! I have never really liked that song...a little too "drinkin' beer with the buddies" for me ("it's a guy thing"-lol)-it was also played into the ground through my formative years, so I usually hit the button on the radio ASAP. Now whenever I hear it, I will think of Eddie, and Crossing Over, and about messages from the other side. THEN I will hit the button! I wore a coat to the funeral that I hadn't worn in a while. When I was leaving the funeral I put my hand in the pocket and found the baggage checks from O'Hare from when I went to my Grandmother's funeral in April [April 14th-blog-"Death and Taxes"]-I love you too GRAMMY!!! I'll see you again!
Posted by mandalafly
at 12:01 AM PDT
Updated: Friday, October 14, 2005 1:11 AM PDT
Tuesday, October 11, 2005
Focus on the Positive
Mood:
 celebratory
Now Playing: If I saw You in Heaven (?)-Eric Clapton
Topic: Life and Death
HHHHMMMMMMMMMM........ Where to start. I think that as a rule we are conditioned to whine about things because when we do, people come to our aid and offer solutions. Whether we take them up on it or not is another story, but for the most part we like to have something to fix. I mentioned in my blog this morning that I was frustated by the financial squeeze that I feel today while knowing that there is money owed to me that is just days out of reach. I am far from destitute, and while I have a list of wants, it is so material that it seems ridiculous to even talk about it. What is my health worth, or my family, or my friends? In typical Universe fashion, I was reminded what was really important today. I already knew that I was going to a pot-luck for a friend of mine who would have been celebrating his second wedding anniversary today. His wife is the woman who lost a short but intense battle with ovarian cancer this summer. I did NOT know that today was going to be the day that another friend of mine would lose her husband who has been struggling through Leukemia treatment for three years now. (We did know that it was going to be soon). I know that at this point passing was a blessing. It doesn't make it any easier for those who were with him and fought so hard to keep it from happening. I knew Eddie for about three years before he found out he had cancer. He always called me Moo-chellie. He would come into the restaurant to wait for Linda to get done, and have a beer at the bar. When the show "Crossing Over" came out, he would come and discuss it with me. When I found out he had leukemia I did a reiki mandala for him. When I found out about the bone marrow transplant, I had dreams about him. I told them about what I saw, but I never really got a response, so I let it go. I still remember the dreams. I know that I will hear from him from the other side. He did what he had to do. I know that I will take from this experience, and use it in future situations, and I know that I will be hearing from Eddie now that he has "crossed over" as well. Stay Tuned!
Posted by mandalafly
at 10:34 PM PDT
Updated: Tuesday, October 11, 2005 10:36 PM PDT
Abundanza
Mood:
 cool
Now Playing: If I had a Million Dollars-Bare Naked Ladies
Topic: SQUEEEKKIN BY!!!
Blah. I am in a place where I can't stand to be. I am feeling the squeeze of what is acting a lot like a Saturn lesson-truth and restriction. I find that I undervalue my services to a point of giving my stuff away. I will settle for a price because I feel like someone else will think I am greedy. I think that just because I couldn't afford me, that means that no one can. I also think that sometimes I feel like I can do so much by myself that I don't accept help (or money) from other sources. There is a Sagittarian aspect-something to the effect that if someone gives me something I will owe them, and I don't want to be bound to obligation. Mostly because my Capricorn Sun and three planets in virgo that create a double grand earth trine with my Jupiter in Taurus makes me a WORKHORSE!!! If I decide to take on an obligation, I will go above and beyond the call of duty to fulfill it. The Jupiter placement is beneficial, however my Saturn placement says I will not make any progress until I learn how to stop being my own worst enemy! The most frustrating thing this week is that I have $8 in my bank account until I get paid Friday. I am waiting for someone to pick up a mandala, I have an insurance check waiting in the wings, (got to dot a couple more t's), I have another mandala commission, I am working extra shifts at the Guacamole Gorda, Baboo got a four day workshop out of the blue, and I am investing time on my faerie boxes. I am sure that by Saturday I will be just fine. I just have to make it through until then. I am so busy until then I am not sure how I am even finding time to worry about it, but it is probably BECAUSE I have so much going on that I feel the need to pump the nerves up to full capacity. Coffee anyone-I'm feelin the burn!!! Thought for the day: What am I really worth?
Posted by mandalafly
at 9:45 AM PDT
Sunday, October 9, 2005
Movin' On UP!!!
Mood:
chillin'
Topic: Harbinger
Had a dream about an apartment that was in the basement-kind of half underground. I was getting ready to move and there were people coming to show the place. I switched to a different vantage point, one where I could see the place from the outside. I got a sense of light coming from inside, there was a pale yellow light emanating from the windows. When I woke up, I had a sense that it was a shift in energy in my house, and my body. Later, I was washing my umpteenth champaign flute at Los Empanada's Empire. I was daydreaming about what it is going to be like when I am travelling the world, teaching mandalas, and promoting creativity. I started thinking about what had led me to this point, and about what I needed to do next. I thought about how many times I have read accounts of people who, after their awakening moment (phase...whatever) thought that life would change, and they could quit their job, and just-I don't know, be a GURU? Maybe they thought that they would just float to the next plane (fly me high into the starry sky...) Maybe they thought that it would be constant bliss, that nothing would ever go wrong in their lives again. I know that all of these thoughts have crossed MY mind. I think one minute that I am pretty high on the enlightenment ladder, and then I have a moment where I just want to growl at the next person who asks me to get them another basket of chips! It reminds me that I have a ways to go. I thought about how absolutely ordinary and every day intuition actually is, and how many people really know things, but are afraid to say them for fear of looking strange. I thought about how inherent our senses are, and how much we take them for granted. I thought about how lucky I am to be able to notice. I spy with my Third Little EYE...What do YOU see there?
Posted by mandalafly
at 11:49 PM PDT
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