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Entry 366? HA!
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Infirma
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Jambalaya Anyone?
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nappy
needs assessment
Never Ends
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NEXT!!!
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Now Be Here
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Odds n Ends
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OK
OM
OMG!!!
On Purpose
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Onion Layers
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Poor Boris
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the Grindstone
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the strangest of places
THIS ONE!!!
Thursday
THURSDAY!!!
till dreams come true
Time
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tripper
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Twins
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Updated
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Well? RU?
What A Day
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What Does It Mean!!!
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What You Want
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WHAT?
Whatever
Wheel of Fortune
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Where the Heart Is
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Who Are You?
Who Knew
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Who Knows
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WHOOOSH!!!
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Wor'd Up
Work Work Work
WOW
WOW!
X-File
YAY!
Year of the ROOSTER
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YIPES!!!
You Bet Your Asp!
You Can Too
You Never Know
You're On It!
Yowl....
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
|
MANDALABLOG
Friday, January 6, 2006
Business Plan Blues
Mood:
 irritated
Now Playing: Theme From Scooby Doo
Topic: Blaaaghhhhhhh!!!
I finally pulled out my business plan again to finalize it for my grant, and I realize why I have been putting it off. It's redundant, redundant and redundant. There are 37 pages of the same core questions- What do you do? ART! Who is your customer? PEOPLE WHO HAVE BIRTHDAYS! Why do you do it? BECAUSE I CAN! Where will you market it? TO ANYONE WHO WILL LISTEN! Which way is your industry headed? UP! OR WHY BOTHER! When do you expect to make a profit? NOW! How do you expect to ever make it in the world of business? AS SOON AS YOU STOP ASKING ME THESE STUPID QUESTIONS SO THAT I CAN GET SOME WORK DONE!!! Argh-I know that jumping through the hoops is all a part of it, but does it have to be so...businesslike? I'm a creative being-Do you think they would accept a mandala with the symbols of what success means to me instead? Okay-I know that this is why I haven't gotten further already-BACK TO THE WORDPERFECT...(trudge,trudge,trudge!!!)
Posted by mandalafly
at 9:53 PM PST
Updated: Friday, January 6, 2006 9:54 PM PST
The Afterlife
Mood:
 special
Now Playing: My Sweet Lord-George Harrison
Topic: The Lack Thereof
Hi. I just had an interesting night. I got on before bed to write to all of you and while checking up on a case that has been developing in my life since Thanksgiving, I came across an Atheist Blog that stirred it up inside of me!!!. These folks are really fired up over their beliefs that the Afterlife does not exist. The funny part about it is that they are so adamant in their belief (religion) they argue about it with anyone who wants to go at it. If you TRULY don't believe that something even exists, why should you even bother to give it another thought? Much less argue about it. I read it with great interest, watching the arguments develop between people who didn't really seem to get the fact that the Afterlife (or lack therof)was simply the subject they exploited to BE RIGHT about. Do they really believe that they are so superior to everyone else that they can prove something that we have been unsure of for as long as there has been dark and light? It was an amazing display, and I might add well researched, and persuasive on both sides. My own personal belief is that energy does not die. Knowledge is forever and accessable to all at any time. We just need to figure out how it is we get at it. As far as an Afterlife goes, I have my own concept of it-I'm sure I'll know it (or the lack of it) when I get there. I do not need fear to motivate my intentions. I do not care whether you believe what I believe. I just want to be able to work with others to take care of each other-no matter what. I need to do my part to make things better RIGHT HERE, RIGHT NOW. That's my story, and I'm sticking to it. I need to make some art. I didn't post the name of the Atheist Blog because I would rather not lend strength to their arguments by sending in my troops, but if you are interested in a Theological Cock Fight, contact me and I will give you the link. Be nice to each other.
Posted by mandalafly
at 3:40 PM PST
Wednesday, January 4, 2006
As Above/So Below
Mood:
special
Now Playing: Sledgehammer-Peter Gabriel
Topic: As/Is
Hey Y'all-Happy Hump Day. I had the day off from the Churro Burro, and the kids went back to school-WAHOO!!! I checked a few tedious, but necessary tasks off of my list so that I couldn't use them as excuses tomorrow, and had a pretty average day. I have been meditating a lot today about the way that I am balancing things in my life. I know that in my fantasies I just have to get up, go to my well lit, warm, spacious, well stocked studio, create a bunch of artwork, and the little art faeries take it off to stores and galleries and the money faeries shower me with the rewards from the fruits of my labors. OH YEAH-that is even more far fetched than winning the Mega-Bucks. I am reminded of a story that I heard from a Buddhist Monk some time ago. It was about a young man who goes to the monestary and begins his training. He is told to fill a trough of water and then slap the water back and forth until the trough is empty again. The next day, he is instructed to do the same excersize. And the next day...and the next day...and the next...and...until he has been there for an entire year. He is miserable and lonely and misses his family. When he gets the chance to go home, his family is so excited and wants to hear everything about his training. He remains very quiet until a point during dinner when he has finally heard enough about how wonderful it must be to be training to be a monk. He gets angry enough that he stands up and tells his family that all he has been doing all year is filling a trough and emptying it...and as he raises his hand to emphasize his point, he sweeps it down and breaks the table in half. Suddenly he realizes that he has been training for the extraordinary through the ordinary. He realized that all of that repetitive drudgery, was honing his skill far beyond what he'd ever imagined. I am trying to keep this in mind. I have heard that many people who consider themselves on a spiritual path have a tough time feeling like they should have to do the "mundane" tasks of everyday exsistence. We need to remember that personal accountability is a part of the contribution to the whole. The more we can do to reduce the amount of energy it requires to be us, and reduce our dependence on other people to take care of the details we don't feel like tending to, the better off we'll all be. I definately have my "I don't wanna" moments, but I really am trying to consciously create an existence that is maintained as naturally and fuss free as possible, while still being able to function in the "real world". I'm sure I can do it...now whose turn is it to empty the dishwasher?
Posted by mandalafly
at 12:01 AM PST
Updated: Thursday, January 5, 2006 12:29 AM PST
Tuesday, January 3, 2006
Mercury in Capricorn
Mood:
 amorous
Now Playing: Takin Care of Business-BTO
Topic: Bizzzness
AHHHH-for those of us who thrive on having a lot of "arrows in the air at once" the arrival of Mercury (travel and communication) teaming up with Venus (love and beauty) in Capricorn (house of public standing and career), the sign that the Sun is currently transiting is GOOD FRICKKING NEWS!!! This is a good time for business and tying up loose ends. I could use a few finishing touches around about now. I have quite a few loose ends to tie up. This transit is good for a couple of weeks-I am hoping to be able to make the most of it. Wish me (good) luck! Things could get interesting around Sunday the 8th, when Mercury sextiles Uranus. This is a placement that involves surprise news and quick change. My solar birth year is beginning with this energy. This is usually indicative of big life changes-job, school, residences,-Seems to be what I have been aiming for-let's visualize it all going down smoothly-Thanks. I wish the same for you.
Posted by mandalafly
at 12:01 AM PST
Monday, January 2, 2006
Day Two
Mood:
 cool
Now Playing: Paul Schaefer and the Late Night Orchestra-Auld Lang Syne
Topic: I Resolve
Resolutions-Bah Humbug-I don't make resolutions, I make GOALS. I achieved a number of milestones last year due in large part to my acceptance into the Lane Microbusiness Project Grow. I am happy to report that I have completed my savings and am now eligible for my grant-which means that the next few months I will be busy spending money on things that without this I have not been able to afford. I will be having my zodiac cards professionally printed. I will have prints made and a mat cutter and frames to be able to display and sell them. I want to make zodiac journals. (who wouldn't LOVE to buy my zodiac journals!!!) I will be investing in some new media and trying a lot of new things. I will have a lot of things ready for market and to put into stores this year. I AM SO EXCITED!!! This has been a dream of mine for quite some time-WAHOO!!! This takes me to a new level. This year, with this all underway, I am hoping to be able to go back to the UofO and finish my Bachelor's degree this spring. I am very close, and I think I can squeak a teaching certificate into it and put myself in position to start substitute teaching in the fall. I have thought about it before, but it hasn't been very important until recently when I started volunteering at my kid's High School. Something about dealing with that age is really inspiring for me. Who Knew? In my "spare time" I am working on these multi-media collage pieces and have gotten GREAT feedback so far. I hope to be able to keep up momentum. For the first few weeks of the year it is all about business paperwork so that the rest of the year can be about works on paper (and boxes, and purses, and whatever crosses my path) It is my mission to find new ways to fund my growing art habit. I don't want to take on any more things until I have finished the things I have going right now. I think they can keep me busy until at least July, and by then I will reassess and move forward...ONWARD AND UPWARD!!! Keep up the Good Work, Everyone!!!
Posted by mandalafly
at 8:58 PM PST
Sunday, January 1, 2006
Happy New Year
Mood:
 celebratory
Now Playing: I <3 Huckabees
Topic: 2006
Happy New Year!!! This last couple of weeks has been SO FULL that my routine was completely blown out of the water!! This was a good thing, because I had a chance to do things that were out of my ordinary, and a few things that were downright extraordinary. I have been in Oregon for eight Christmases now, and it seems like they keep getting better and better as I continue to form bonds with this community. Unfortunately, for you-my faithful viewership, I appear to have left you in the lurch-hopefully you have been just as occupied and productive, and didn't have time to miss me too much ;) I hope that your Holidays were really sweet. I will go into more detail in the coming days when I am not up so far past my bedtime. I am really excited about the New Year, there is a really positive Venus aspect (which happens to conjunct my sun in Capricorn!!!) from now until March 5th. It is retrograde until Feb. 3 when a big Pluto aspect kicks in and it is truly a form of out with the old and IN WITH THE NEW!!! In the next month we should be examining what it is we truly love and VISUALIZING what it would take to make it happen in our lives-I've got a really good idea of what that means in my life... I accept.
Posted by mandalafly
at 12:01 AM PST
Tuesday, December 27, 2005
Precious and Few
Mood:
 a-ok
Now Playing: Workin' in a Coal Mine-DEVO
Topic: Cruel Shoes
ssshhhhhhhhhhh.....quickly, before the real world comes a callin'-I have a couple of quiet moments and I can actually share a few choice words with you, the viewer!!! I had a nice holiday-managed to pull off a pretty special Christmas for the boys. They are at their dad's on the beautiful Oregon Coastline for a couple of days, and me and Baboo can just chill!!! Yesterday was the second fixed grand cross that I mentioned earlier this month. This intense aspect should solidify your fortitude and keep you on task for the coming near future. If there have been nagging feelings about your past, you should be taking care of them. Since the sun is in task oriented Capricorn, your daydreams probably concern work and what you do for the public. Since Saturn is in Leo you are probably looking for a way to make work more fun, and with Jupiter opposing it in Scorpio, you are looking for the deep, dark, secret as to what is going to help you get better connected to source! My own personal experience with all of this is that I need to be passing the things that I have learned on. I gave a couple of friends of mine each a Reiki treatment last week and this week I am going to begin to teach them Tai Chi. We are going to get together every Wednesday to have a sort of healing circle. I am loving it. Share the Wealth......
Posted by mandalafly
at 10:15 AM PST
Tuesday, December 20, 2005
Holiday on Ice
Mood:
irritated
Now Playing: Ice, Ice Baybee-Vanilla Ice
Topic: Lost Days
Hi kids-I've got a precious few moments before I get to go to Fernando's Holiday Hideaway. We are conveniently located in a cul-de-sac (isn't that French-we're like an international village!!!) behind one of our two main malls in town. This means that during the holidays we get a lot of people who are out shopping and are making their lists while sipping on margaritas and wishing for warmer weather. This week-being the last few days before Christmas, gets more stressed due to the pressure people are putting on themselves to overspend their budgets and buy, buy, buy. There is also the family factor and the exhaustion from all of the getting together with friends. Add alcohol and you have the recipe for Holiday Madness-in all of it's forms. The most challenging part this year is not coming from dealing with people who are just a little more particular about their food and service because they are in the mode of "everything has to be just right." It seems that the prevailing holiday sentiment this year is pretty joyous (or at least it is for me, so I choose not to let the bastards get me down). The most challenging part of this year comes from the fact that last week, when our alcohol and drink sales are more than DOUBLE the norm, BOTH of our ice machines broke down!!! Of course to replace the condensers would be completely out of the question this week because our annual budget has been spent (and spent again) and we are not really in a position to do anything about them until after the first of the year!!! The temporary solution is to buy ice and have it delivered to the restaurant in large bags. This of course is costly to do for a couple of weeks, so our "frugal" solution has been to send our people over to the Fish House that is on the other side of the cul-de-sac with 6 or so buckets in the morning and again in the afternoon, and then again soon after, and then...Yesterday my level of patience ran out when at 3:30 I was out of ice. I was playing bartender, manager (he had to run to fed-ex), and hostess and trying to put together a to-go order. Meanwhile the food I had ordered myself for "lunch" sat on the break table until the sauce was so cold it was solid. There was no way that I could go get ice-as I was barely holding own the fort as it was. So then a couple of fresh bloods walked in the door and they went ot get ice. It takes me four buckets to fill my bin-I got two. I told them immediately that it was not going to last past five when the next bartender got there (meanwhile we are getting busier and busier) but nothing was done about it. At 4:55 when I was officially out of ice, I went back to the office with two ice buckets, and said "remember when I said we'd be out of ice by 5? It's TRUE!!!" and I dropped the ice buckets off and walked away (because I still had a very busy bar and could not go get any myself. Besides that I had tried to avert the situation by suggesting that they go get more ice at 3:30 when they had the time and the manpower, (and even earlier that morning when I asked him to order it!) but it was not important enough to deal with until it was a crisis. Oh-and what happened after I "made my point"? He managed to fill up a bucket with the feeble ice that the one ice machine that was still trying to make (that was melting as fast as it was making it) and coming up and pouring it into my bin. Then he left the building and went home. I have a few choice words for him when I get there today... What is that prayer about "God grant me the patience not to strangle the $%@#^$% tht so clearly deserves it?" Yeah-pray for me. I'm a little stressed. Thankfully on a BRIGHT note, I am doing a mandala workshop with about 6 of the people that I work with tomorrow for the solstice. I'll let you know how it goes.
Posted by mandalafly
at 9:58 AM PST
Wednesday, December 14, 2005
Fixed Grand Cross
Mood:
 spacey
Now Playing: Yellow Submarine-The Beatles
Topic: Criss Cross
Hey-tomorrow-the 15th, is the day that I have been alluding to. The day of the full moon in Gemini opposite Pluto. This aspect shines the full moon's light on the energy of birth, death and regeneration-which we have had an awful lot of. I am personally ready to get to the regeneration part-out with the old!!! There is a fixed grand cross created by Saturn in Leo-restriction of personal freedom-squaring Mars in Taurus-direction of energy-especially in business and squaring Jupiter in Scorpio-which is Phoenix Fire energy. Saturn is the planet of truth and restriction-Jupiter is the planet of luck and expansion. They will be doing this dance for some time through the next year and when they form an exact square, like this week, the results can be a little frustrating. We want to go forth and conquer, but we are kept from running off by our own realities. It is a time for us to examine our motives and truly get in sync-are we living our truths? If so we will not feel so restricted. If not, this aspect highlights where change is necessary and we can plan for how we are going to realign. The moon in Gemini is opposite the sun in Sagittarius, creating a mental polarity. This too can be difficult if we are not sure what we want. There are some pretty powerful Aquarian aspects happening as well, and we should be realizing that each individual action DOES count in the greater whole. The grand cross and full moon point the way to finding a forum to participate in a greater whole. Whatever is illuminated by this full moon for you will be the basis for your next year of transformation. Personally I am finding myself drawn toward teaching high school students, and I am working toward finishing my teaching degree by May of 2006. I am also feeling some sort of pull toward helping women who are finding their way out of abusive and difficult circumstances. I feel like teaching mandalas can help build self esteem and help them visualize, and thereby manifest what they want to happen in their lives-WORKS FOR ME!!! What can YOU do to help the village raise it's children? They truly are our future.
Posted by mandalafly
at 12:01 AM PST
Sunday, December 11, 2005
Know Peace
Mood:
 lucky
Now Playing: Imagine-John Lennon
Topic: Say What?
I didn't have a moment this week to acknowledge two events that shaped the course of music history. The first one was the assassination of John Lennon 25 years ago on the 8th. For me-(who was born the year after Kennedy was shot) this was really the first experience I had with the loss of an icon-someone I cannot remember not being aware of. I remember that I was in Mr. Schooler's Advanced Biology class (to this day, my favorite teacher) and he broke the news to us. The second: it was 40 years ago Saturday the 10th that the Grateful Dead played their first concert under that name at the Fillmore West in San Fransisco. While it took me far longer than it should have to figure out that I was a part of the Family, I was able to do quite a bit of catching up once I found my long lost Brothers and Sisters. Thank You, Jerry!!! I know that I promised to tell you all about the upcoming astro-events, starting with a fixed grand cross on the 15th, and another on the 26th, but I need to do a little bit more research into it before I go blabbing my big mouth about it. Instead I would like to leave you with a thought that came out of a conversation that I had with a Guacamole Garden patron today. It seems that this person has been through quite a bit of turmoil, and has an awful lot uf unanswered questions. (A state to which we can all relate-I'm sure) He confessed to me that he was relying on Ambien to get to sleep because he could not rest otherwise. He told me that he was looking for Peace in his life. I said "what does that mean to you?" and he just gave me a blank expression. Then it occured to me to say "If you do not know what that is, how will you know when you have found it?" Then I thought-DO I KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS TO ME? I like to think so, but it is definately a work in progress at all times! So, tonight I am giving y'all a homework assignment. Think for a little while about what peace means to you, and what you can do on a daily basis to find it for yourself. Feel free to share your thoughts and insights with me (that's why there is a place at the bottom of this post that says "post your comment"-feel free to use it!)-maybe together we can all get there a little faster... Share the LOVE!!!
Posted by mandalafly
at 11:38 PM PST
Updated: Sunday, December 11, 2005 11:40 PM PST
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